Freely share my views with others

What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?

I had trouble finding the words to name my fear. At first, I thought about saying “public speaking,” but I know I can conquer this fear when I need to. Then I thought, “fear of offending people.” But it’s really more about a fear of putting people with different views than me on the defensive. The truth is that I don’t want to alienate people by expressing my opinions.

Sitting on the plane today, reading Good Anxiety: Harnessing the Power of the Most Misunderstood Emotion (Dr. Wendy Suzuki), I read a description of a man she called Lavon who was involved in local politics.

He loved talking to people, sharing his stories and insights, and especially loved talking to people on the fence or those who held opposing views. He had a talent for open discussion with anyone with any view and enjoyed rather than shied away from it. He didn’t need to “win” the conversation.

Dr. Wendy Suzuki

Dr. Suzuki said that Lavon was a nervous kid who channeled his energy into sports. In college, he struggled with anxiety and withdrew from his teammates on the college basketball team. Lavon reached out to his coach for help. Grateful for the help he received during a difficult time, he wanted to make a difference in the world. As Suzuki put it, he put his empathy into action.

I don’t want to shy away from open discussion about controversial subjects. What would it take for me to freely share my views with others? Perhaps I need to change my mindset. It’s not about changing the other person’s mind. It’s about learning about each other and finding common ground.

It’s about putting empathy into action.

The aches and pains of aging

What do you complain about the most?

I am sixty years old, and my body is showing the natural signs of aging. It seems like I complain on a daily basis about one ache or another – my knees, my back, my shoulder. I don’t want to be one of those people who constantly complain about aches and pains and don’t do anything about them. Well, I really don’t want to be one of those people who complains constantly, period.

Here are a few of the ways I address my complaints:

Exercise. Exercise is great for cardiovascular health, but it also strengthens your bones and muscles. I have osteopenia, a condition less severe than osteoporosis. Weight-bearing exercises help preserve my bone density.

Supplements. I take a multivitamin every day, as well as calcium and vitamin D3 supplements for my osteopenia. I consume some dairy every day, but not enough. I live in a northern state, so I don’t get enough vitamin D naturally.

Rest, ice, support. Exercise is important for overall health, but sometimes you have to rest painful joints. Tendinitis is one of those times. I tend to get tendinitis πŸ˜‰ in my elbows and wrist. Another common complaint of aging is osteoarthritis. We keep ice packs in the freezer. I wear compression sleeves for my knees.

Prevention. Last summer, I fell while trail running at a runners club race. I have fallen many times before and only sustained minor injuries. This time, I fell on my right shoulder, fracturing and dislocating it. Knowing that I’m injury prone and imagining how much worse my fall could have been, the smart thing for me is to do is to stop doing this risky thing.

Acceptance. This is probably the hardest. It’s hard to accept that you can’t do the things you once did. See above. I don’t want to stop running on trails, but I accept that it’s for my own good.

It’s also hard to accept the fact that you can’t fix everything. I consulted a specialist about painful swelling in my ring finger. I injured it years ago, falling in an exercise class. Now I have arthritis and a swollen, ugly knuckle. My hope was that surgery could fix my joint. The doctor said that surgery would not make it better. His advice was to use pain medication. Basically, deal with it.

Aging is not for sissies. It comes with aches and pains. It comes with disappointment at not being able to do what your young body could do. But there are many benefits to staying physically active as long as possible!

I can’t end a post about complaining without an expression of gratitude. I am grateful that I’ve reached this age. I am grateful to be healthy. I am grateful that I can get up and move!

Blah blah blah. Sports Schmorts.

What are your favorite sports to watch and play?

I never played sports except when I had to in school. I was a very shy kid and would have preferred to be invisible when it came to participating in team sports. When I had to play, I was always one of the last kids chosen to be on the team. I did enjoy swimming, tennis, badminton, and ping pong.

As an adult, I was talked into playing on my company’s volleyball team one year. I like volleyball but wasn’t especially good at it and besides, the ball hurts!

My husband watches all kinds of sports on TV – football, basketball, soccer, hockey – even golf. He doesn’t watch baseball, the game he played as a kid. I think baseball games are too slow-moving.

We have been to professional football, basketball, baseball, hockey, and soccer games. Even if you aren’t an avid sports fan, the atmosphere is entertaining. I like watching basketball the most.

Because I am not athletic, I prefer individual sports to team sports. I don’t want my performance to drag anyone else down.

I just signed up for my running club’s winter Frozen Challenge, which began yesterday and goes until the end of March. I committed to running 10 miles a week. I was put on a team that includes people who will run up to 40 miles a week. I don’t have to worry about not being a great runner. I just have to meet my modest goal.

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Help kids in my community

What would you do if you won the lottery?

If I won the lottery, it wouldn’t change the way I live my life. I don’t need a luxury home or a fancy car or trips around the world to be happy. However, I would love to make a difference in the lives of kids.

My church is right across the street from a middle school. This year, the church opened a teen center to give the kids a safe place to go after school three nights a week. As many as 80 kids have come through the church’s doors in one day. The response to this ministry has been overwhelming for the youth pastor and the volunteers.

Many of these kids are financially disadvantaged. They don’t have the best home life. Volunteers and mentors can have a positive influence on them at a time when they are vulnerable.

I heard that our youth pastor has dreams for a new building. Lottery proceeds could help his dreams come true.

I heard about one kid who lives in a hotel with his mom. She doesn’t have a cell phone or a car. With enough resources, our church could provide financial assistance to the school’s neediest families.

There is also a need for volunteers at the teen center, so I am prayerfully considering volunteering one night a week when I retire.

It is amazing to see God at work!

Books on my reading list

What books do you want to read?

I have two unfinished books on my reading list. The first is Good Anxiety: Harnessing the Power of the Most Misunderstood Emotion by Dr. Wendy Suzuki. I bought this book at an airport six months ago. I read the first six chapters, then put it aside and forgot about it. I hope to finish it on my business trip next week. I can feel my work anxiety building, so the timing is good.

The other unfinished book is Jon Meacham’s And There Was Light. The book is about Abraham Lincoln, which reminds me that our country has survived being deeply divided before. I won’t take this one along on my trip because I wouldn’t mind being forced to buy another book at an airport!

One of the women in my Bible study group suggested doing a study about Jesus. We chose Philip Yancey’s book, The Jesus I Never Knew. I have already read it, so I bought another book we considered reading: Jesus: The God Who Knows Your Name by Max Lucado. Yancey is a deeper and more serious writer than Lucado, so it will be interesting to contrast their approaches.

As a follower of Jesus, I’ve been concerned for years about the way so many Christians today seem to care more about political power than about furthering the kingdom of God. I believe this is turning people away from the church. To better understand what’s going on, I would like to read Tim Alberta’s book, The Kingdom, the Power, and the Glory: American Evangelicals in an Age of Extremism.

My pastor recommended a couple of books by Peter Scazzero for people who want to learn how to practice the Daily Office:

Daily Office- Remembering God’s Presence Throughout The Day: Begin The Journey

Emotionally Healthy Spirituality Day by Day: A 40-Day Journey with the Daily Office

My reading list probably sounds very boring to most people. I do like to read a good mystery or crime novel, but these are the kinds of books that feed my mind and soul.